For many Americans, Memorial Day is barely more than an observance of a federal holiday, a time to gather for a barbeque with family and friends and raise a glass for freedom. Even mainstream media can sometimes objectify the day with stock footage of flags on tombstones or a televised reunion featuring a child throwing out the first pitch at a baseball game only to discover that her redeployed parent is hidden behind a catcher's equipment.

That's not to say that these private or communal moments acknowledging the holiday aren't well-meaning. However, for those who have served in the armed forces or have lost family, friends, or brothers and sisters in arms, there is a solemnity and bitterness to the last Monday in May. Remembering the fallen has a personal cost that feels heavier than barbeque, beer, or baseball.

For this reason, we want to highlight the importance of getting Memorial Day messaging and activities right and suggest appropriate and impactful ways to commemorate the day that honors our nation's fallen and is respectful of those who have lost family members or friends.

Decoration Day

On May 5, 1868, General John A. Logan, leader of an organization for Northern Civil War veterans, called for a nationwide day of remembrance later that month. "May 30, 1868, is designated to strew with flowers, or otherwise decorating the graves of comrades who died in defense of their country during the late rebellion, and whose bodies now lie in almost every city, village and hamlet churchyard in the land," he proclaimed.

This Declaration of Decoration Day came only five short years after Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address was delivered, where his words were forever memorialized and now often quoted about the degree to which serving, fighting, and defending the freedom of this country echoes throughout time.

The Dead Shall Not Have Died in Vain

In his 1863 speech, Lincoln summarized his view of the Civil War in just ten short sentences. His primary message of the Gettysburg Address is that ideals are worth dying for and that it is up to the living to carry on the work of those who died to protect them. The standards of equality and freedom are the bedrock of the United States as a nation.

"It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—"

Today, 160 years after Lincoln's public urging to honor those who gave the last full measure of devotion, Americans continue to enjoy ongoing efforts for equality and freedom. So how can one honor those for whom life in the fight ended too soon?

Carry On the Work

Below are three ways to make Memorial Day meaningful at your institution and some ideas for student involvement across campus. As you commemorate the day, these events can take center stage in your communications, specifically on social media. Military-connected students will appreciate the efforts and likely engage where they otherwise may not have. Consider using a hashtag -- like #yourintitutionhonorsthefallen or #yourschoolremembers -- to measure engagement and serve as a respectful reminder of what the event is for!

Connect with the Fallen

Sites like Fallen Heroes or Honor the Fallen display faces and biographies of service members who have paid the ultimate price – some as recently as a few months ago. Seek out fallen service members who are alumni or from nearby towns to honor on your public channels. Pair this with the National Moment of Remembrance, and at 3:00 p.m. on Memorial Day, have a moment of silence for their lives and those they left behind.

Get Involved

Commit to choosing a local or national veteran support program where student groups or faculty can donate time or resources in the coming year. Places like the Travis Manion Foundation, the Disabled Veterans National Foundation, the VFW, or the Children of Fallen Patriots Foundation are good places to start.

Workout for our Heroes

Events involving physical activity on Memorial Day are popular with the military community because of their ability to forge bonds and induce healing through a shared challenge. In the Crossfit community, the annual Memorial Day Hero Workout, Murph – in memory of Navy Lieutenant Michael Murphy, is a grueling exercise of endurance and grit. Organize a group, likely amongst your athletes, to convene and honor our fallen in this way.

A less extreme variation of a physical event would be to track and report walk or run mileage to the national Wear Blue: Run to Remember campaign, where you can join alongside others as living memorials.

This year on Memorial Day, whether you vow to get aligned with a charity organization, observe the day in quiet reverence, or complete a rigorous physical activity, do it in remembrance of those service men and women who gave their last full measure of devotion to our nation.

Remembrance vs. Celebration

The military community is sensitive to this holiday above all others. It can be a communications nightmare if your institution misses the mark but touts its military friendliness or support for veterans. There are many ways to honor the day appropriately, but the biggest and most common misstep is wishing others a "Happy Memorial Day."

Veterans, active duty service members, and military families agree that the day should be spent with loved ones and friends. Still, the day should not pass without acknowledging those missing from our celebrations and lives. Recognizing the day as one of sharing memories and honoring sacrifice is paramount. That's not to say that celebrations aren't allowed or frowned upon, but it's a certainty that those who are no longer with us are felt.

With a holiday that revolves around remembrance, you have a unique opportunity to make sure you, as an institution, are clear on what's being remembered and to create traditions that help all students recognize the weight of this national sacrifice and for military-connected students to feel truly seen.

Honoring Memorial Day: What’s Appropriate and What’s Not